Values clarification, value frameworks and fault finding

(This is the second of two articles focusing on values and their role in conflict)

Our behaviour tends to be driven by unconscious or conditioned values until we become aware that we have other value options. Values do not become truly our own until we have consciously and freely chosen them from among diverse options. Clarifying values for oneself and one's community takes consciousness, time and effort, and can be a disturbing experience in terms of our identity and sense of belonging. Choosing our values and behaving in a way that is congruent with them - even when that entails placing the collective good above self interest - requires self-discipline and maturity that can be hard won. This maturity and discipline is invaluable when it comes to resolving and transforming conflict. So how do we get there? Slowly! But some of the following may help.

Louis Rath's work on values from the 1960s emphasized the importance of focusing on the "process of valuing"; what it means to have values, how to develop consciousness of values, refine one's choices, enact them, and so on. This is in stark contrast to the still-predominant approach of advocating a particular set of values without considering alternative or opposing values.The following questions are based on his work and all need to be applied to each value choice.

1. Are you proud of your value  - do you prize and cherish it?
2. Have you publicly affirmed your position - do you stand up for it when and where it matters?
3. In choosing your position have you thoughtfully considered many alternatives?
4. Have you evaluated the pros, cons and consequences before choosing your position?
5. Have you chosen your value freely - without duress or pressure from people or situation?
6. Have you done anything about your values i.e. taken action to live or implement your values?
7. Have you acted with repetition pattern and consistency on this value?
8. Have you considered its order of importance in relation to your other values?
9. Have you considered how it relates to others' values, both friends and those you dislike?

Each of these questions helps us clarify and feel connected to our own values. If we can say yes to each of these questions it is highly likely that we will feel pride in our identity, in who we are and what we stand for, and will have strong levels of self-esteem and self-confidence. If not, we can use these questions to explore our values - what is important to us; how important relative to our other values they are to us; and how they impact on our relationships. Such value conscious prepares us to recognise and redirect their potentially troublesome and disruptive impact during conflict.

Some people find this approach difficult without help from a coach or a learning support group and may find starting with a values framework a more helpful way of beginning. A values framework such as McCann's (see book review) sets out a range of different value clusters (listed in box below), in the form of a wheel highlighting typical polarities that we experience in work life. McCann's workplace examples include tensions between organizational constraint and organizational freedom, whether one should prioritise one's own interests or those of the team, choose independence over conformity and so on. By laying out values in such a manner he enables us to appreciate values offered by opposing positions, from a neutral position, and prior to identifying our own value stance. Coming at it in this way, it is easier to appreciate opposing stances - a more difficult task when we encounter them from our own value position. Also it helps us choose our values having considered alternatives as Raths suggests above.  Most who carry out this exercise report something like "Oh that makes so much sense to me, helps me to accept what I am and why I don't get on with so and so and the difficulty I experience in my organisation".  A swift return, but just the beginning of the exploration.

This process quickly illuminates the tensions that give rise to interpersonal and organisational conflict.  If others have also done this, it will make it easier to surface the value dimensions to the conflict and begin to appreciate how opposing values may complement each other depending on the demands of situation. So for example, people who believe that stability is important may find it difficult to handle times of uncertainty whereas those who value change may not. Likewise those who value stability will feel more at home in an organisation of long standing with settled processes and procedures rather than a loosely structured, Hi-Tech start-up responding to a volatile operating environment. 

At an interpersonal level, those who value change will tend to see the opportunities posed by change, and tend to be irritated by those who like stability and who will tend to see the barriers and obstacles to change. They may also judge those who focus on opportunities as a bit reckless or as rushing into change without due consideration. Reverse antipathy will also occur in parallel. One position's security is the other's frightening scenario but each can be seen, when viewed from a neutral position, to add value to a decision or challenge, though that may not be readily obvious to either perspective. The framework provides a quick route to establishing this neutral viewpoint.

Another way in to understanding our values is through our experience. As mentioned in the previous article, we often become aware of our values when we have a visceral reaction to a violation or anticipated violation of a value. Often we cannot put words on it but we may realise that we have become riled up or defensive. We may not even realise this until we start finding fault with the other person or their position, become judgemental or have begun releasing our emotion in the form of critical attack (defensiveness). A values framework can help us find the connection between the violated value and what we find irritating or unacceptable in the other. By becoming aware of our sensitive "fault buttons", we can become more conscious and less defensive when these buttons are triggered. We can then respond by realising and articulating our own value rather than attacking the person holding an opposing position or becoming paralysed and remaining silent.  Examples below are from McCann.

Irritating behaviours (fault buttons) that trigger adverse reactions/violate values of each work value type	Work-Value type
Those who disobey orders; anyone rocking the boat	* Compliance
People who do their own thing; those who refuse to conform	< Conformity
Those with no integrity; people who put themselves before others	^ Collectivism
Those "in control"; people who think they are always right	> Equality
Those who enforce obedience and the strict following of procedures	* Empowerment
Those who conform to the status quo and refuse to embrace change	< Independence
Those who need involvement and consensus on all decisions	^ Individualism
Those who don't respect hierarchy; people who question orders	> Authority

The names of Work-Value types in this model represent clusters of values and do not show the full richness of the model. Usually represented as a wheel, opposing value pairs are marked by similar symbols above and the opposing nature of values will be obvious on closer inspection. As presented here, they are illustrative of the understanding to be gained and just focus on work rather than life values.  Framed as value conflicts these troublesome irritations/violations can be surfaced and discussed rather than acted out unconsciously or personalised as they usually are in conflicts.

 Some suggestions for working with value conflicts

• Appreciating other's values: Consider relationships that are difficult or troublesome and identify the behaviours that irritate or alienate you. Identify any patterns of behaviour, or violated values that are common to these relationships. Can you imagine an alternative scenario in which these behaviours might have value?
• Awareness of own values: Consider relationships that are easy, worthwhile and in which you feel energised and identify those behaviours that draw you toward those relationships. Likewise, identify any common patterns of behaviour, or values in-action that are common in these relationships. What do these tell you about what it is that you value?
• Values and self-esteem: When we are evaluated against values that we consciously hold and feel proud of our self-esteem is more likely to be strengthened and we are more motivated to align our behaviour with our chosen values.  When we are regularly judged on the values of others that we do not choose or prize, we may find our self-esteem suffers; our performance is impaired and we may become defensive about our worth and behaviour. The latter is not uncommon where we live or work in a situation where our personal values are in conflict with the predominant ethos and can cause great unhappiness. 
• Internalising others value systems: Sometimes it is difficult to recognise internal value conflicts.  For example we can espouse a value stance and act congruently with it in our lives but still feel wracked with guilt, shame or even fear without knowing why. This is often because we are choosing and acting counter to the value system we grew up with or were conditioned to comply with when we had less freedom to choose our own values. The old value system still holds sway despite our new choices and we still expect punishment or retribution for contravening it. By becoming conscious of the older value system, how we acquired it and how it holds us, we can lessen its grip and affirm our chosen position.